Perspective is one of the number one solutions to the challenges we face in life. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that changing the way I look at things changed my entire life.
For years, I focused on all the things that seemed to be going wrong. It felt like life was throwing one obstacle after another in my path, and every new setback became another reason to feel defeated. But something shifted. I stopped looking at these obstacles as roadblocks that were keeping me from my dreams, and I started seeing them as lessons—lessons that were shaping me, teaching me, and ultimately guiding me to where I needed to go.
And this isn’t just about the big moments, either. It’s about the little things—the everyday frustrations that pile up and threaten to bring us down. Because the truth is, sometimes when life seems to go “wrong,” it’s actually the universe trying to teach us something or, maybe, even protect us from something we’re not ready for yet.
We all have those moments, right? Those moments that felt like a blow to the gut, but in hindsight, we see that they were blessings in disguise. For me, it wasn’t just one moment that shifted my perspective—it was the accumulation of many little moments that taught me just how much control I actually have over my own experience. Because here’s the thing: we can’t control what happens to us, or what life throws at us. But we can control how we react, how we perceive those situations, and what we take away from them.
The Turning Point
When I think about a time in my life that really drove home the importance of perspective, I honestly can’t point to just one moment. There have been so many—and they continue to show up in new ways. But there was a time, not so long ago, when I just got sick of feeling like life was always throwing curveballs at me, and I was forever scrambling to catch them.
I was tired. I was tired of stressing over things I couldn’t control: the unexpected gallbladder surgery that cost way more money than I had, the job I had to quit because I couldn’t find reliable childcare, the years of house hunting that never seemed to pan out, the plans that always seemed to fall apart. And there were many more “storms” along the way—times when I let life’s challenges get the best of me, when I didn’t even fight back. There were days when I would crawl into a hole of despair and let the weight of it all take me under. It was easy to feel like the world was conspiring against me.
But then, something shifted.
I started giving more attention to the things that went right. I began to focus on the moments that worked out, the things that made me smile, the victories—big or small—that I had forgotten about in the rush of everything else. Slowly, I started to give less attention to the storms and more attention to the rainbows that followed them.
Life is going to suck sometimes. That’s inevitable. We can’t avoid the difficult, the messy, the painful parts of life. But we don’t have to let it consume us. We don’t have to wallow in the misery. We get to choose where our attention goes, where we allow our feelings to linger.
And I choose to linger in the happy.
Choosing the Happy
I choose to embrace difficulty as an opportunity to improve. I choose to see loss as an opportunity to create room for something better. Because here’s what I’ve learned: the things that felt like setbacks were actually steering me in a direction I needed to go.
For example, if I had kept that job I had to leave, I wouldn’t have the job I love now. If those friendships hadn’t fizzled out, I wouldn’t have had the time and space to build the meaningful relationships I cherish today. If I had bought that house that didn’t quite feel like home, I wouldn’t have ventured out and found the place where my soul truly feels at peace.
Perspective is powerful. It’s the difference between feeling stuck and feeling free. It’s the difference between being consumed by frustration and finding peace in the chaos. It’s the difference between looking at life’s challenges as roadblocks and seeing them as stepping stones.
The control we crave doesn’t always come from changing the circumstances around us—it comes from changing the way we view them. The way we choose to respond. The way we choose to look at life, not as something that happens to us, but as something we get to participate in.
Embracing Life as It Comes
So, I’m not saying life won’t throw us curveballs. It will. But here’s the thing: we don’t have to keep running the same race. We can slow down. We can shift our perspective, take a deep breath, and remember that we have the power to choose where we place our focus. We get to choose what we learn from, what we let go of, and what we celebrate.
Because when we choose to see life through a lens of growth, gratitude, and opportunity, we can weather any storm—and when the rainbow appears, we’ll be ready to embrace it with open arms.
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